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Writer's pictureAmber Dabney Smith

Your Tie to Happiness

Strength is more than a muscle, it’s a mentality. One of the most important fights you will ever fight is your inner voice that has been conditioned for mediocracy and the easy road, because it is more comfortable. It’s time to recondition your mental strength to “sweat”!! When you think about your daily actions, stop applauding yourself for doing the stuff you’re just supposed to do anyway. Don’t just be ordinary. What are you going to do that is over and above?



Albert Einstein said “If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not people or objects” It’s one of my favorite quotes, and just so you know, food is an object. Don’t tie your happiness to that. Willingness to set tough goals (long term ones) for yourself and exercising the discipline to do hard, uncomfortable things, defines ordinary from extraordinary.


Zig Ziglar said “What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals.” (Needless to say, another favorite)


To me this means don’t stop until you’re proud, and then keep going so you can stay proud!!! Having a strong sense of self worth is important and good! When this happens, we have a great passion for life, feel content and grateful. Because we persevered at a particular goal and achieved, we become someone who always moves forward and continually achieves!!!


Work hard and do your best everyday! Live life with no regrets. And I mean this in a different sense than most do when they say it. I mean to live life intentionally good (not just with good intentions) doing your best to always do what’s right and good for yourself and to others, so that you won’t have to regret your decisions later. Don’t allow today’s temptations to cost you tomorrow’s possibilities. We often choose instant gratification over our long-term goals…..Fitness or otherwise. Make promises to yourself and then keep them. THINK STRONG in the moment! However, don’t get discouraged when failure comes. It will come. Don’t quit! Don’t give up! Don’t stop! The kind of pride that comes from this is the good kind!


With all of this in mind, who you allow yourself to be around is important. Laziness, negativity and carelessness about your health will rub off on you whether you like it or not. Surround yourself with people that support your goals and have similar goals themselves. In order to be successful, you’ll have to make sacrifices. This could include activities, habits, and aforementioned relationships that do not promote success because they are wasteful, distracting and unrelated to your goals. There are plenty of activities and habits that are conducive to your goals, and people to have as friends that will support you, and contribute to your success. Anyone that has ever achieved anything great has worked hard and made great sacrifice.


While I believe in setting extraordinary goals for yourself, your short term goals must be realistic in order to achieve the long term extraordinary ones. And the goals must absolutely be your own. The shame and guilt from imposing unrealistic goals on yourself, or allowing someone else to impose their goals for you on to you, can lead to stress and unhappiness.

An example as it pertains to fitness goals would be feeling that you are failing or letting yourself down because you ate a cookie, or caved over a slice of pizza. This can actually cause you anxiety, depression and anger.


Stop the guilt. It’s easy to feel that your self-worth depends on being perfect at your nutrition and/or your number of workouts. It’s time to abandon the pursuit of perfection, and instead, time to begin to cultivate an attitude of making progress. Making changes to your habits goes a long way. But one step at a time is not only healthy physically, but also psychologically and emotionally. Keep trying. Practice makes progress. Just do the best you can. I’m here to support you.


Come on! Gear up! Set your plan. Your one step at a time plan! Life is happier when your happiness is tied to a goal on the side of extraordinary! I want you to be and have the EXTRAORDINARY!

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